“
While awaiting sentencing, I decided to give stand-up comedy a shot. The judge had suggested I get my act together, and I took him seriously.
— Tim Allen
No quotes are currently available.
Tim Allen
comedian, film director, voice actor, film actor, television actor, racing automobile driver, television presenter
🔗 Read on Wikipedia1953
Timothy Alan Dick, known professionally as Tim Allen, is an American actor and comedian. He is known for playing Tim "The Toolman" Taylor on the ABC sitcom Home Improvement (1991–1999) for which he won a Golden Globe Award and Mike Baxter on the ABC/Fox sitcom Last Man Standing (2011–2021). He voices Buzz Lightyear for the Toy Story franchise (1995–2026) for which he won an Annie Award and played Scott Calvin and Santa Claus in The Santa Clause franchise (1994–2023).
All Quotes by Tim Allen
“
Men are pigs. Too bad we own everything.
— Tim Allen
“
Men are liars. We'll lie about lying if we have to. I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive.
— Tim Allen
“
Men are liars. We'll lie about lying if we have to. I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive.
— Tim Allen
“
Dad needs to show an incredible amount of respect and humor and friendship toward his mate so the kids understand their parents are sexy, they're fun, they do things together, they're best friends. Kids learn by example. If I respect Mom, they're going to respect Mom.
— Tim Allen
“
Dad needs to show an incredible amount of respect and humor and friendship toward his mate so the kids understand their parents are sexy, they're fun, they do things together, they're best friends. Kids learn by example. If I respect Mom, they're going to respect Mom.
— Tim Allen
“
Dad needs to show an incredible amount of respect and humor and friendship toward his mate so the kids understand their parents are sexy, they're fun, they do things together, they're best friends. Kids learn by example. If I respect Mom, they're going to respect Mom.
— Tim Allen
“
Dad needs to show an incredible amount of respect and humor and friendship toward his mate so the kids understand their parents are sexy, they're fun, they do things together, they're best friends. Kids learn by example. If I respect Mom, they're going to respect Mom.
— Tim Allen
“
My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.
— Tim Allen
“
In marriage, compromise nurtures the relationship.
— Tim Allen
“
My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.
— Tim Allen
“
Men are liars. We'll lie about lying if we have to. I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive.
— Tim Allen
“
In the last three years of racing I've met as many women fans as men fans, and in NASCAR it's the same thing. My wife loves cars, but the difference is she doesn't have 20 years of understanding the background of them. She basically drives them and uses her gut feelings as to which is best.
— Tim Allen
“
Men are liars. We'll lie about lying if we have to. I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive.
— Tim Allen
“
My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.
— Tim Allen
“
Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon.
— Tim Allen