The Ashes

In Affectionate Remembrance of ENGLISH CRICKET, which died at the Oval on 29th AUGUST, 1882, Deeply lamented by a large circle of sorrowing friends and acquaintances R.I.P.

— The Ashes

N.B. – The body will be cremated and the ashes taken to Australia.

— The Ashes

I've not travelled 6,000 miles to make friends. I'm here to win the Ashes.

— The Ashes

England have only three major problems. They can't bat, they can't bowl and they can't field.

— The Ashes

A fart competing with thunder

— The Ashes

I'm struggling now, I've not been to bed yet and behind these sunglasses is a thousand stories.

— The Ashes

Matthew Hoggard called the Prime Minister a knob when we were celebrating winning the Ashes at a Downing Street function, and you know what? That's the first thing Hoggy's got right in a while. Blair is a knob.

— The Ashes