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It's a good thing that beauty is only skin deep, or I'd be rotten to the core.
— Phyllis Diller
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Phyllis Diller
actor, comedian, voice actor, stage actor, television actor, film actor
🔗 Read on Wikipedia1917 – 2012
Phyllis Ada Diller was an American stand-up comedian, actress, author, musician and visual artist, best known for her eccentric stage persona, self-deprecating humor, wild hair and clothes, and exaggerated, cackling laugh.
All Quotes by Phyllis Diller
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The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron.
— Phyllis Diller
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I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them.
— Phyllis Diller
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Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?
— Phyllis Diller
“
Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out.
— Phyllis Diller
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My recipe for dealing with anger and frustration: set the kitchen timer for twenty minutes, cry, rant, and rave, and at the sound of the bell, simmer down and go about business as usual.
— Phyllis Diller
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Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.
— Phyllis Diller
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A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once.
— Phyllis Diller
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Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves.
— Phyllis Diller
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There's so little money in my bank account, my scenic checks show a ghetto.
— Phyllis Diller
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What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.
— Phyllis Diller
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Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out.
— Phyllis Diller
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Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.
— Phyllis Diller
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Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
— Phyllis Diller
“
Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?
— Phyllis Diller
“
Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.
— Phyllis Diller
“
My recipe for dealing with anger and frustration: set the kitchen timer for twenty minutes, cry, rant, and rave, and at the sound of the bell, simmer down and go about business as usual.
— Phyllis Diller
“
Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?
— Phyllis Diller
“
The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron.
— Phyllis Diller
“
I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them.
— Phyllis Diller