Jerry Stiller

For some people the revelation comes too late that life is best kept to the essentials. Some people are given their last rites and that person might say in their last breath, "I should have celebrated Festivus."

— Jerry Stiller

All I'm saying is, if you celebrate Festivus, you may live a little longer. You are getting back to the essentials, to the days of gods on mountaintops and howling wolves. Because you are saying the holidays are in the heart, a celebration of being alive with our fellow humans. For that purpose, an aluminum pole will do just as well as anything else —\xa0as long as it's not stuck in the wrong place.

— Jerry Stiller